Love Game... Over

I posted recently about my slight, but unchecked, affection for Love Game - the TV drama that gives over-acting its bad name back.

Well after thirteen episodes the first series of Love Game came to a conclusion last night in a fittingly overblown fashion involving such shocking events as poisoning, stabbing and cabbage throwing. Allow me to recap the plot of the episode for you, otherwise I know you'll feel left out.

The Love Game this time focussed on a seemingly good hearted bento girl, who slaved humbly away in her bento shop saving for the cheapest wedding dress to marry her boyfriend of some years. The challenge: a zillion yen (or whatever the amount is, I forget) if she can marry him within 24 hours. The twist? That he's actually got another girl on the side, the rich daughter of a politician, that she didn't know about. The other twist? That during a scuffle in a park the previous year he killed a homeless guy by accident, so the good hearted girl, even though she's good hearted, decides to blackmail him into marrying her and dumping the rich girl as she (the humble, good hearted, working her fingers to the bone girl) is the only one who knows he killed the homeless guy.

Remember, my Japanese isn't good, Yuki translated a little for me every now and then, but I probably missed some subtleties. Still, the show's only half an hour and this plot seemed... somewhat squeezed in considering everything is paced to allow for inordinately long dramatic speeches and about six commercial breaks.

Then the politician reveals he knows about the humble girl, and the boy who's in the middle of all this realises he has to make a choice... and says he'll marry the good hearted, humble, salt-of-the-earth girl - secretly intending, of course, to kill her.

Oh yes. Murder, the only rational solution.

The mysteriously beautiful Love Game woman realises this and steps in, trying to stop the humble girl from going to the chapel, since she'll be killed. The humble girl says - I know, but this boy's all I got, and since my whole life's come apart since you offered me this deal - I'll let him kill me.

Oh, and before that the Love Game woman went to get all enigmatic at the bento shop and the humble girl threw cabbage at her. Just thought I'd mention that. At this point the politician has been forgotten and his daughter was only in the show for two scenes.

But even now it's not so simple, that's why I'm writing all this out, it was like The Outer Limits with social-climber Tokyo-ites and infidelity.

The events at the chapel were the icing, the filling and the cherry on top. The plot was torturously revealled, but I'll break it down so it's easy for you mouth-breathers to follow.

The boy's at the chapel with a flick knife in his hand and murder on his mind. The girl arrives bearing secretly poisoned bento with which she (surprisingly) intends to do him in. He suddenly realises that she must have poisoned his bento, so he switches it for hers while her back's turned but actually, although she had been intended to poison him, she had a change of heart at the last minute and decided to poison herself. Hence, the poisoned bento had been hers and he ends up eating the bad one. She finds the knife... they struggle and he ends up with it and she says - you might as well stab me since I've poisoned myself anyway. At that point he starts coughing up blood.

Later he also stabs himself for good measure.

It was quite something.

All this fun reminds the mysterious Love Game woman of the boy who bled to death in her arms (on that roof top she wakes up on in the closing credits, I knew that had significance) and she resolves to unlock all the missing parts of her memory. The final Love Game... is hers.

Indulgent? You're welcome.

The Japanese TV Times? Love Game

I like Love Game, because it's ludicrous and cheesy even in comparison with other ludicrously cheesy TV dramas. Bunny and I watched (what turned out to be) the first episode when we were in Tokyo, and were hypnotised. Then I couldn't remember what day it was on, or what time, or what channel so I lost track of it completely... only to find it popping up on a Thursday night when I was channel hopping a couple of weeks ago.

And a quick internet hunt brings up a site where you can stream or download an English subtitled version of the first two episodes! You're welcome internet. Now you can "enjoy" it along with me!

Love Game's premise is simple. A mysterious, beautiful woman (mysteriously beautiful or beautifully mysterious? It's never made clear) offers a hundred million yen to some poor dope if they do something... to do with love. Like seduce someone, or lie to their wife, or fuck a porpoise - you get the idea. Of course the offer seems creepy but relatively risk-free, they can tell the truth about the game after they've got the money and put things right, so they accept. Oh, but little do they know that it's all an elaborate set-up to reveal some crushing secret about their own life that they were unaware of. And no-one wins... the Love Game.

The Love Game target in the first episode is this schmuck:


Notice the meaningless "LOCK ON" thing there. I mean, it's not like they're gonna fire a missile at him or something. However I guess they do have an unexplained and improbable amount of surveilance following everyone around relaying the pictures back to the mysteriously beautiful woman's wall of TV monitors. I mean, it's like there's a TV camera crew wandering about these people's houses that they've forgotten to ask about. Anyway, where was I? Oh yeah, this guy's on surveilance LOCK. No getting away for him.

All he has to do is get his wife to sign divorce papers within 8 hours and the money is his. After that they don't have to get a divorce, he can just tell her the truth and tear up the paper and they can take a long vacation to Hawaii or something.

Of course this is where he really ends up:


So emotionally devastated that when he attempts to turn around and walk he falls over his own feet.

Oh, spoiler warning! In case you actually do want to watch that link above. To be honest I don't recommend it. I mean the show's only thirty minutes long, and fun and cheesy but you could spend that time stirring chilli or whittling. There are better things to do.

See, he has a ploy to get his wife to sign the divorce papers, but one thing leads to another and it turns out that his otherwise prim and proper wife ("a real Japanese flower" we're told) was actually his brother's psychotic stalker. When his doctor brother (who's twice the man he'll ever be) cut off their affair she skewered herself to his desk with a scalpel and ended up being carted off by the cops. Since she couldn't get near the older brother she tracked down the younger one and... next thing you know they're married and they've got a kid. And now that our "hero" is fully aware that she's a complete lunatic she assures him that he's the one she loves now and she'll be by his side... forever.

And all that's left to say is:


Oh, and then there's the end credits where Beautifully Mysterious wakes up all post-coital in her nightie on an urban rooftop:


Answers on a postcard for what that's all about. It's possibly back-story to explain why she's wrapped up in this whole emotional-trauma racket, but equally likely is that it's a TV producer who thinks that chicks in night-dresses on rooftops is way hot.